Patience

Good things come to those who wait, proverb.

He that can have patience can have what he will, Benjamin Franklin.

True and meaningful dialogue is tough. It requires honesty and sincerity, time, and that each person actively listens, respects, and gives due consideration to the perspectives, ideas, and insights that each party brings to the table.

It allows us to identify our differences (beliefs, values, goals, etc.), find a common ground, break walls, build bridges of understanding and goodwill, and finally develop stronger and more meaningful relationships.

If you really want to understand and know someone, you need to talk less and listen more, you should spend a lot of time together with your partner, where he or she is experiencing different moods and emotional states, and circumstances and situations change as they usually do, and all of this requires time and patience.

We are the product of our experiences and choices. We are also the product of many moments. Some of them are unforgettable, and yet others we wish we could forget. Some moments are priceless, some interesting, others are just plain boring and frustrating. That's why we need time and patience to get to know the real thing, which is, the real you, without blatant lies, fake appearances, or deceitful masks. The true self unfolds in this step by step journey paved with words, deeds, good intentions, struggles, promises, and actions that we call life.

Notice the difference between taking time to get to know one another, to talk, discuss, and compromise the key aspects of the relationship (marriage, money, children, or family) and avoiding conflicts by walking away from certain situations, not talking about sensitive and potentially divisive issues, and denying reality like an ostrich with its head in the sand, that does nothing to deal with its problems.

This is undoubtedly a bad attitude that can poison and endanger your relationship unnecessarily. When it comes to grieving the loss of a loved one, you need time and patience to process the loss. However, when a conflict arises in your romantic relationship, you need to face it and deal with it in a constructive way. It is important to be assertive, and not aggressive, passive or manipulative. Be cool, calm, and collected when dealing with problems, conflicts, and stressful situations.

You also need time to be together doing things you both enjoy, fun and enjoyable activities that bring energy, pleasure, and fulfillment to both of you. Create times and spaces to talk about everything and nothing. Make time for intimacy and sex with your partner no matter how busy and tired you are.

How do you handle conflicts? Be humble and understand that “it takes two to tango.” In other words, be sincere and self-critical, ask yourself how you have contributed to the conflict, accept your responsibility, and apologize if necessary. Do not blame him/her, but rather express how you feel. Listen actively, share responsibility, but be assertive to voice your ideas, opinions, and concerns freely. You both need to be able to dialogue, reach compromises, and take effective measures to overcome your problems and differences.