How to deal with the know-it-all person & stop being a know-it-all

The truth is you don’t know what is going to happen tomorrow. Life is a crazy ride, and nothing is guaranteed, Eminem.

Knowledge makes people humble and arrogance makes people ignorant, Boonaa Mohammed.

Know-it-all people arearrogant, conceited, and annoying. They constantly interrupt others and jump into conversations to inject their knowledge, answer some questions nobody have asked them, and offer unsolicited advice and help. They explain or have an opinion about everything.

S/he could undermine our self-esteem and professional image by providing a “more competent and knowledgeable” opinion regarding any issue, project, etc. They thrive on arguments and heated discussions to gain attention and prove their knowledge, but they may also avoid commitment, responsibilities, and hard work whenever they can. They don’t really want to get their hands dirty by doing any of the work. They may be scared to commit to something that may not work out.

They are almost unteachable because they hate being corrected and proven wrong, have poor listening skills, their self-worth and ego is tied to their knowledge and competence, and they cannot admit their mistakes, but, boy, they like showing off their knowledge, correcting and teaching others.  

How can we deal with them?

• It is very important to accept the most basic rule. The person is not going to change. I insist, just face it, you are not going to change him or her. Accept this fact.
• Choose your battles wisely. Be selective of the discussions and confrontations that you get involved in. The fact is, not everything is important or profitable. Some battles are not worth fighting. Focus on your main goals and key objectives. Some battles are lost causes or lost before they even start, and you have to cut your losses.
• If you need to argue with him/her, breathe deeply, keep calm, and do not lose your temper.
• Be prepared, do your homework and know your facts and stuff very well. By doing so, when the know-it-all tells you how to do your job, you will know what to say to confidently get your points across, and explain why some decisions and actions were taken.
• Lead by example. Swallow your pride, be humble, admit that you don’t have all the answers, and draw the team to work together on your goals. Wisdom is knowing how much you don’t know. It is smart to acknowledge and say that you don’t know everything or have all the answers, but you are still an asset to the company, a confident, productive, and effective employee. Besides, you are willing to learn from your mistakes and others around you, and grow.

  All decisions involve risks and uncertainty, and results are not always guaranteed.

• Talk to them tactfully and sensitively, take a reflective, active listening, not confrontational or judgemental and collaborative approach. You can demonstrate that your decisions and actions are well-thought-out and soundly constructed, be focused and assertive, project confidence, and yet don’t make it personal, show good manners, respect, and kindness so you can stay in good terms with them.
• Do not take it personally. Breathe deeply, keep calm, and respond in a non-threatening, not confrontational, and non-judgemental way with sound arguments, solid reasons, and supporting figures and facts. Avoid showing any anger or frustration, yelling, swearing, being sarcastic, or anything alike.
• Empower yourself, stay positive, be confident, but not overconfident. Stand for what you believe in. Do not let them walk over you, stay firm and assertive. You are worth it! You are good enough!
• Life is too short. Keep a good sense of humor while dealing with them. It can help you to not take it personally, cope with them more effectively, and not to go crazy in this madness we call life.
• If you handle the situation correctly and tactfully, you may learn from his/her comments, ideas, and suggestions. It can help you to stay up-to-date in your field in order to be updated and competitive, improve your performance, products or services, find bugs and errors, etc.
• Sometimes, you just have to agree to disagree. There will always be people who hear yet don’t listen, who look but don’t see, they just don’t get it and never will. They are just there, standing right in front of you, thinking what they’re going to say next. They simply listen with the intention to reply rather than understanding the other person’s perspective and ideas. Let them go, do not engage, consider this dialogue as an useless endeavor. Effective communication requires more than an exchange of information, it is about active listening, empathy, willingness to learn and change, negotiation, and compromise.